I coulda been a contender

I took a picture, it’ll last longer

I got my haircut and beard trimmed major. I told my barber that I need to look mildly respectable for my big shot at reality tv.

See, I think I’d make a great apprentice for Martha Stewart. I’ve got sensitivity toward design, and I’ve been a business owner for over 8 years. Oh the list goes on and on why I’d be a great match.

I didn’t fill out the application. I figure I would just drive up to Columbus Ohio for the open call and get my wrist band, then sit in a cozy corner filling it out, play with my laptop, read a book, eat a candy bar, that sorta thing.

I wake up super early (for me) and iron some duds, previewed with friends last night who thought I looked like I had an extreme makeover.

I drove up and got there only to find it bitter cold, and a long line outside.

I hollered above everyone, “Is this where we get wristbands?” Everyone looked at me with fear. They knew I would easily beat them. What they didn’t know is that I have a few triggers.

I can handle almost anything in life. Death and taxes are even tolerable. But standing in a line? I can’t do it.

I don’t think Martha would either, and that’s exactly why we would’ve been perfect for each other.

So I took some photos and drove back homeโ€”all before noon. Now I’m putting my baseball hat back on and untucking this shirt.

Categorized as HoHum


  1. Snazzy! ๐Ÿ™‚ I told my friend Ron that things would be good for him in the dating scene if he just took off his battered baseball hat and trimmed his beard… will forward him your picture to elucidate my point ๐Ÿ˜‰
    (not that I’ve seen pictures of you in a baseball hat with a flowing beard… if that was the case, you should definitely do a “Before & After”)

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